That person gave me a “look” for what I have in my grocery cart. She thinks I am fat (or too skinny). He is looking at what I ordered. We all feel judged on a regular basis, but is it always true?
When I’m in line at the grocery store, I never know where to look. You can’t stare at the person in front of you, if you look at the food on the belt you could be perceived as judging. Frankly, I just want to buy my food. I don’t care what you do or don’t have in your cart. Sometimes I think the person near me is judging my purchases. They are probably caught in that same awkward moment I am.
That general feeling that people are judging your body size – probably isn’t happening either. When was the last time you walked around anywhere judging the size of everyone you see? Why do we assume everyone is judging us? Is it because a few people have done it and we know it CAN happen? Most likely, it’s because we are uncomfortable in our own skin.
Often, we assume that everyone is looking at us the same way we look at ourselves. We think everyone notices that imperfection we see in the mirror. Perhaps, if we stop judging ourselves we won’t feel that constant judgment out in public. The more comfortable we are in our own skin, the more comfortable we will be in public.
Here is a great reminder from Dove that we are often our harshest critics
I could tell you about the Marathon Mondays I attended, that I met my husband working a block from the explosions – but I wasn’t there this Marathon Monday. I was home safe with our children. Our good friend was caught in the craziness with her young children as they awaited her husband and sister-in-law. We were able to text and I looked for where the runners were being sent and then they shut off the cell phones.
Unlike Newtown, where we could hide the news from our boys (6 and 8), they saw the story and knew their friends were there. I was, thankfully, able to tell them their friends were safe. The questions began about who would do this and why. I started with there are bad people and ended with “I don’t know”. They hated “I don’t know” and felt I was hiding some big secret from them.
Someday, they will learn – Mommy really didn’t know how someone could do this. They have seen the fear an act like this creates and learned at a young age there are monsters in the world.
Our thoughts and prayers are with everyone in Boston as yet again I look to my young children and I can’t imagine the pain another mother is feeling. We have to come together and make positive changes. We shouldn’t have to shield our children from news of their peers dying. There is too much good in the world to allow these acts. Come together, don’t point fingers and name call – be the positive change!
Consistency is key. We all know we have to keep showing up, but then what? Having danced my whole life, I know how to approach similar classes. I can see my goal and work for it. I was completely lost on the treadmill.
As I continue to work towards jogging 4 miles, I realized what a mess I was. I had no direction or plan. I would get on the treadmill from time to time and begin to run fast, then I would get tired and walk at random paces and inclines then I would try running at a different pace. No wonder I hated it!
By doing some research and setting my goal, I began doing intervals. I found a pace that made me work, but didn’t kill me. Each week, I add a minute at the faster pace. I am feeling a sense of accomplishment and I can see my progress.
I realized some of my students feel the same way. They come to class and try the hardest modifications and then they are beat before class is over. I am encouraging them to pick their level at the beginning of class and follow it all the way through. Just like finding the right pace on the treadmill, it’s important to work at the right level in class.
Keep going at your perfect pace and you’ll meet your goals
Each week I fill my house with healthy breakfast, lunch and dinner options for my husband and our boys. By the time I’m done rationing the fruit and preparing meals – I’ve missed my own food. As a result, I often skip breakfast and indulge in a large, unhealthy lunch.
Why is the health of my family more important than mine? It’s not! All of our health is important. The better I fuel my body, the better I can be for myself and my family.
For the last two weeks, I’ve been making myself an equal participant in the healthy planning. I include myself in the fruit rationing and meal preparation. My energy has increased, and my workouts have been more effective.
Do you put others ahead of your own health? Look at your own meals and decide if you would feed them to the rest of your family. Remember to take care of yourself – you are worth it!!
Each week, I post a series of core exercises on my Simply Modern Fitness page. There is a seated series as well as a standing series. I am excited to announce that I have recently begun adding short videos. Here is one I did this week. I hope you enjoy!
As human beings, judgment is a survival skill. We observe choices that other people have made and determine how it would help us or hurt us. As the world deals with senseless acts of violence the pain and the act itself is incomprehensible. We turn to judgment. How young is too young to attend a late movie, should the parents have known their child was capable of such an act or looking at the content of the movie itself.
These are all natural reactions because we want to think it won’t happen to us or that this could have been stopped. Sadly, it did happen and there was no way of knowing that brining a small child to the movie could result in injury and death. It is time to take the next step in judgment and have compassion. Compassion is also human nature. This helps to separate us from animals; we see what another person goes through and we can feel for them. The bodies will heal, but many will have emotional injuries that will last a lifetime. Being a strong society will allow us to stand together and lend helping hands. Staying away from the squabble of gun control and movie content will help us move forward. Yes, these are real issues but not the true culprit.
We can make the choice every day to smile and help those in our communities. By reaching out and embracing those near us, we can gain strength and compassion. There are so many organizations looking for volunteers that help people of all shapes and sizes. This is a great time to connect with those around us and not let fear and judgment separate us.
I began yoga as a dancer looking for fitness and over the years, I have begun to appreciate all that it does for me physically, mentally and spiritually. There was one aspect I still didn’t enjoy – chanting or even an om at the beginning or end of class. It somehow made me feel as if I were a yogi impostor. Simply, I didn’t get it. As I continued to practice and share my practice with others, I avoided the chanting. I would go along with it in class, but it never had any meaning for me.
The opportunity presented itself to attend a day-long intensive with Shiva Rea and I jumped at it! I traveled to New York City with my husband and children and set off on an adventure. I chose the one day intensive so that I could have a great yoga experience, but not miss out on enjoying the city with my family. This was one of my better ideas. I woke up early on Friday and made sure the kids and my husband were ready for the day and I walked uptown to the Yoga Journal Conference. I had no idea what to expect and began to feel a little nervous and anxious on my walk. I didn’t know a single person going and I had no idea what to expect. I knew they were adding vegan options to restaurant menus at the conference and I had enjoyed a large cheeseburger the night before. Was I going to be alone in my love of meat? Was I going to be the only person who didn’t know the meanings of all the chants?
Turns out it didn’t matter. No one knew that I had a cheeseburger the night before, it simply didn’t come up. Luckily for me, Shiva Rea went over all the meanings of our chants at the beginning of our time together and they are beautiful. After registration, I went and found coffee and met a few people who had traveled in for the day. They were extremely nice and some were also moms. We talked until it was time to find our teachers and prepare for the day ahead.
We began our time with Shiva Rea chanting “Om” as one. It was one of the most amazing experiences! To feel the large group come together collectively took away any fear or discomfort that I had been feeling. It was a moment of harmony that stayed with us through the whole day. Our day included some power point and wonderful explanation from Shiva and we moved collectively through Namaskars. For the second half of the day, we set up our mats in a mandala (life is wholeness, be and see 360 degrees). It was extremely powerful to share the practice in this way. As you were in yourself, you could see the movement and energy ripple across the group.
Moving forward, I hope to practice in this way as often as possible. Moving as a group with intention and sharing the overall experience is something I will never forget! It has come with me when I teach classes myself and I am looking forward to sharing a collective experience, beginning with an “Om”!
Macro shot of a box of clementines, Citrus reticulata 'Clementine' . (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
We all know that fresh fruit and vegetables are good for us, but they often get thrown into the refrigerator drawer and forgotten about. Often when we are hungry, we want a quick fix and cutting up fruit and veggies can be a pain. The key is to make fruit and vegetables the easy choice.
Buying fruit that can be washed and put into a bowl on the counter is a great place to start. Most kids love apples, bananas and clementines (you probably love them too when you think to eat one). By having them on the counter they can help themselves. The next time they say they are hungry or want a snack, direct them to the fruit bowl. Eventually, they will do it on their own.
Another way to make eating fresh produce easy is to prepare it when you get home from the store. In my house, I have to ration the melon. I cut up the cantaloupe or watermelon and put them into single serving containers. This makes it easy for the kids to grab but they don’t sit with the big container and eat it all in one sitting. I do the same thing for grapes.
Next, is veggies. Baby carrots are a staple in my home. The boys take them from the fridge and eat many a day. Cucumbers are another easy one to prepare ahead. You can cut them in circles or into sticks and put them into containers. I mix it up with the kids so it seems different. Celery is another one to prepare ahead. Basically, it is all about making the fruits and veggies easy to grab finger foods.
Preparing single servings ahead of time is not only easier around the house, but makes it easy to pack them in lunches or for a snack on an outing. Maybe take the family for a walk and enjoy some fresh produce in the middle of your adventure. It will help refresh you and keep you going.
Enjoy the warmer weather and all that it gives us!!